By: Reenita V
The idea of self-love might be a cheesy idea for some and for some it just might make perfect sense. I mean, isn’t it obvious that we should love ourselves? Some don’t have to try so hard to love themselves while others cringe at the idea. Self-love sounds simple but it can be a hard task for anyone no matter if their journey has been tumultuous or not. So, what exactly is self-love? Self-love is loving every inch of your being and this means physically, emotionally and mentally. Self-love is loving every choice that you make, asserting yourself in your decisions and basically being proud of who you are. Self-love is you being your biggest cheerleader.
There is such a push in society to find love in others. We are surrounded by this idea that we need to date, fall in love and marry. We need to have someone fall in love with who we are and sometimes in that process we can neglect ourselves. We are supposed to have children who are our worlds. Our love is supposed to be manifested through their eyes and actions. We are supposed to love our friends, our family and our jobs. Constantly, we are supposed to push love outwards and doing so is supposed to bring love to us. The idea of pushing love outwards sounds exhausting. How are supposed to love others when we haven’t created a foundation of love for ourselves.
Self-love encompasses many facets. We can express our love for ourselves by being involved in a sport or craft that we love, taking the time to self-care by reading, writing yourself a love note or by just telling yourself each and every day that ‘I love me’. Loving yourself comes in the form that best allows you to create a space where you feel safe and empowered. Take time, as often as you can, to look inwards and seek those aspects of yourself that you may not feel so great about. It is finding those scars where you can start to create the love required for you to heal and find the love you need. It is not acceptance for our faults that we need nor do we need to come to terms with what we dislike about ourselves as those ideas seem that we are just acknowledging what has happened or what we don’t like. We need to dig further and discover why we don’t love whatever we are seeing inside and navigate the journey to loving those scars, habits, images, feelings that we carry daily.
While we are not always in charge of what happens to us in our journey, we are absolutely in charge of how we navigate the outcome. We are not required to seek love for ourselves through the eyes of the beholder. If we are pulled in ten directions, we are allowed to say ‘stop’ and take the time to reflect, heal and get grounded. If life hits you with something difficult, it is your right to heal at the speed you need. While a shoulder to cry on or ears to listen is important, we need to reclaim our ability to build ourselves by love developed within. It seems a daunting task to love another if we truly do not love ourselves. When emitting this circle love for others, ensure that the starting point begins and ends with you.